Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Happy Reformation Day!

I had the great privilege of leading worship at Our Shepherd Lutheran School on Reformation Day, 2007. Asking the question, "What would the Reformation have been like if there were telephones back then?", this is the message I delivered.



Office of Pope Leo the Tenth, how can I help you? Oh, he prefers the white ones. Yes. Yes, with the little frilly parts. Thank you.

Office of Pope Leo the Tenth, how can I help you? Yes…no, no, no. his name is John Tetzel. No, he did not invent the pretzel. Thank you for your call.

Office of Pope Leo the Tenth, how can I help you? Oh good, it’s you. Listen he wanted gold, not bronze. What’s the matter with you? This is the Pope we’re talking about! Get it done!

Office of Pope Leo the Tenth, how can I help you? Who’s that? Martin Luther? All right, just a moment…let’s see here…ah yes, here he is, Martin Luther, of the Augustinian order, professor at the University of Wittenburg, preaching duties at the Castle Church. OK? Thank you.

Office of Pope Leo the Tenth, how can I help you? Well that’s strange, I just pulled his information. Did you just call? Oh, OK. Well, Martin Luther is professor at the University of Wittenburg, he preaches at the Castle Church there. If you don’t mind me asking, uh, why are you asking? He did what? 95 Theses against the sale of indulgences? On the Church door? Oh dear. Are you sure it said “against indulgences?” OK. Uh, well, thank you for your call.

He’s not going to like this at all.

Office of Pope Leo the Tenth, how can I help you? Oh, John Tetzel! Indulgence Preacher Extraordinaire! How are you doing? Oh. Oh dear. Sales are that bad? You know, I just took a call…that’s the guy. Martin Luther, he…yes, 95 theses…but it’s not going to be that big a…they’re making copies? Yeah, but people are still going to want pay for forgiveness. It’s so convenient! Oh. Oh. We’ve got a problem, don’t we? OK. Alright John, we’ll be in touch.

FOUR YEARS LATER

Office of Pope Leo the Tenth. Yes. Luther? No. No one knows where he is. He disappeared after the Diet of Worms, that’s what I heard. Well, that could be. Good riddance, I say. Thank you.

Office of Pope Leo the Tenth. The Diet of Worms? Yes, I heard all about it. Oh, I see. Well, Luther was called in before Emperor Charles the Fifth, our representatives were there, Spanish troops were posted. Oh, the Germans were there, too. And so they bring Luther in, and there’s a table with all his books piled up, right? And the chancellor asks him, Did you write these, and is there a part of them you want to take back? Well, you know he was supposed to say, “yes”…instead, he asks for time to think about it! Can you believe it? Yeah, well, they gave him one day. And he comes back and says, Unless someone can show me from Holy Scripture where I have gone wrong, I will not take back what I have written! Here I stand, I can do no other! Unbelievable! (Laughs.) Right. That’s the last we’ll hear from Martin Luther!

FOUR YEARS LATER

Office of Pope Adrian the Sixth. Yes, under new management, hardee-har-har. Get lost!

Office of Pope Adrian the Sixth, how can I help you? Yes, of course we know Luther is alive. Well, the German princes are not about to let anything happen to their little…yes, we know. We know…he what? Married a former nun? If this is a joke, it is in very poor…yes, we’ve seen his writings…a German language Bible? The Word of God in the language of the common people…well, it’s turning Germany upside down, I can tell you that. Good-bye.

Office of Pope Adrian the Sixth. Yes, hello? Yes. Yes, of course, of course I’ve heard of Martin Luther, it’s all I talk about all day long!!! Uh, I’m sorry. Well, yes, we’re aware of his writings, of course. They’re what got him into all this trouble, after all. Have I ever read them? Personally? Well, no, no I haven’t. Who are you, anyway? You want to read me part of Luther’s writings? I really don’t think that would be…What did you say? The good news of Jesus demands no works of us to become holy and redeemed. It requires only that we trust in Jesus, because he has overcome sin, death, and hell for us…but…but…what was that? Every Christian is a little Christ in service to our neighbors? But that’s…The righteousness of God is a gift we get by faith? Luther felt that the gates of paradise were opened to him once he understood this, huh? You mean to tell me that I can have all the benefits of Christ’s suffering, death and resurrection just by believing it? Yes, that’s what you mean. And good works are done because we’re thankful. That’s what this Reformation is all about? Hmm. No, thank you. Thank you for your call. No, I mean it. Bye-bye.

Guess I’m under new management, too. Where did I put those want ads?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Very informative and thought-provoking presentation. It was well-received. This was a good way to remember the impact that Martin Luther had on the world.
Blessings,
Your Proud Dad